Attendance. Notwithstanding the fact that our illustrious Treasurer thought there were only 17 attendees today, she was over-ruled, hence:
Present: 41 Apologies: 10 LOA: 4 Silent: 19 TOTAL 74
GUEST: Just the one - Nicholas Meloni
* Michele B is still looking for beds 19/20 April - 6 in total. If we don't provide them, the Club will lose the income
* Fines money is going to the Women's Refuge to supplement The Mount/Everest challenge
* Dave 1: There will be a Rypen debrief after next week's meeting
* Dave 2: Te Papa Club is holding a Duck Race 11 June. Tickets $5. Corporate ducks are available
* Dave 3: The Savealife website is up and running again and we have disposed of thousands of aspirins to Tonga. Good to see that they don't have to be destroyed (The aspirins, not the Tongans)
* Kathy. Three talented artists, none of which is Banksy, will be creating a masterpiece in Red Square on Saturday from 12.30 to 1.30. Best of luck to Mayor Greg, Simon Bridges and Todd Muller. (On second thoughts, maybe one if them is Banksy)Any auction lots for Treasured Art  pertaining to food or drink, to complement a set of Jamie Oliver pots and pans. kindly donated by Marianne Boonen, would be gratefully received.
* Updater for the Club website and Facebook pages requested - Larissa had her hand up first
* Fraser Lellman has handed in his resignation
Wayne's World Words of Wisdom: 'The height of your accomplishments is determined by the depth of your commitments'
Mayor Greg Brownless gave an entertaining and informative account of his first 3 months in office. Letters from residents - most of which come from 'Ken' (not White) - have abounded since his swearing-in in November. An early test was the cancellation of the New Year's Eve bash following police advice. Needless to say, it cost more to police the non-event. Veiled threats were also in evidence when a dog ran away after being spooked by a fireworks display - 'Ban fireworks!' came the cry. More serious comments included the vision of Tauranga over the next 30 years (and a view in hindsight how much it has changed over the PAST 30 years). By 2050, it is estimated that there will be c285k residents, a third of which will be over 60 and c35k over 80; many jobs at present using real people may well be performed by machines; there will be an increase in the temporary worker community and there will be a much improved public transport system. There's an all-electric car in the Council fleet - Greg loves it! Lots of changes and improvements are in the pipeline - watch this space (and watch out for more JAFAS). A riveting presentation and much appreciated.
SERGEANT Pauline, moving quickly on from individual fines and comments about National Transgender Day, embarked on a series of contenders for 'Most Crappy Job', which included, Taser Tester, Road Kill Remover, Animal Masturbator (really? - Ed) and Armpit Sniffer - Yuk. Best Jobs were cited as Professional Snuggler (bless), Chocolatier, Voiceover Actor, Waterslide Tester and to cap it all - Professional Sleeper.
Warren Scobie's parting thought 'Everybody who comes into your life brings us pleasure. Some when they come. Some when they go' (unattributed)